Pleasing people

Everyone has a certain person in their life that they just can't seem to please. Nothing you do is right, your opinion is wrong, you're career choice is wrong, you're dating the wrong person ect the list could go on forever. I've had the misfortune of dealing with lots of people like this through out my life and unfortunately I still have to deal with a few. I got to thinking about this topic "pleasing people" and wanted to know what GOD had to say about it and I found this verse.

Galations 1:10
For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.

This verse tells me everything I wanted to know, that the only person we should worry about pleasing is GOD because HIS judgement is the only one that matters.

It's so easy to get mad at people for looking at your life and then picking you apart. It's not right, it's hurtful and I personally feel violated when it happens to me. It's one thing for someone to suggest something to you, but to just pick you apart like you don't have feelings is just mean and cruel. I guess I'll never understand why they do it or what kind of thrill they get out of it. I do know one thing, their day of judgement will come and will be sorry. I guess it's just time for me to pray for patience and as the saying goes hate the sin and love the sinner.

Growing

On Wednesday night our Pastor talked about maturing as a Christian. He compared "baby" Christians to an infant saying that you wouldn't feed a two week old solid food, so if you're trying to help a "baby" Christian grow you wouldn't give them a ton of information that would be hard to absorb or even try to begin to comprehend and overwhelm them.

I am no longer a "baby" Christian, but I'm far from grown. I believe there is always room to grow and always new things to learn. It hasn't been that long since I felt like a "baby" Christian. I didn't understand anything that any pastor said, I couldn't follow along with anything. I believe that the devil had a hold of me and wouldn't allow me to understand. I'm so glad that GOD helped me overcome that and helps me daily to understand HIS will. I feel so blessed to be so close to GOD. I'm so happy to share what HE shares with me. Sometimes I get frustrated when I know HE wants me to share something, but doesn't reveal it to me right away.

Last week was a test for me. My aunt went to the hospital and found out that she had several mini strokes and my best friends grandpa had a car accident and then passed away. Going to the viewing wasn't as hard as the funeral and spending time with her afterwards. It brought back so many bad memories for me from losing 3 of my grandparents. Even though they've been gone 9+ years, it still hurts. I feel so bad for her. I know exactly what she's going through and there's nothing I can do for her. After coming home Sunday night, I got the kids ready for bed and spent some time alone downstairs. Out of nowhere I lost it. I cried uncontrollably for over 2 hours.

People deal with grief in many ways, but I've always went to GOD. HE speaks to me through music most of the time, but there are some rare occasions when HE just comes to me out of nowhere to help me understand something. HE reminded me that there really isn't anything I can say to Laura to make her feel better, she's going to have to deal with this tragedy in her own time and way. Then HE reminded me that when you're looking for satisfaction out of anything worldly, you're looking in the wrong place. HE is the only one that can satisfy every need we have. Now that I'm not a "baby" Christian, I can understand that. There is nothing in this world that can make your pain go away (from any situation) other than the comfort of JESUS!

Following the Shepherd

I know this may sound cliche' but with the rise in crime and the economy it's hard to think it can't get much worse. Everyone is trying to be politically correct, trying not to offend anyone by what they say and now even their opinions. Christianity is being attacked. It has been for years, but I think it is more so currently than in previous years. Now more than ever we need to be the best example we can be as Christians. I've always tried to take advantage of every opportunity to share Christ with non-believers. It's hard to remember sometimes, but it's not our job to fight these battles alone. I think we get into a certain mindset and think we can conquer the whole world but when things get tough and out of balance, that's when we call on GOD. The thing is, GOD is our Shepherd, we are his flock and HE guides and directs our paths. If we would just simply allow HIM to do HIS will by being in control from the beginning, things could be so much simpler. 

More recipes

I made my baby breakfast for our anniversary. 2 bacon, fried egg and cheese sandwiches with his favorite iced coffee with redi whip and a love note.

                                      On Wednesday I made something similar to what I saw on Pinterest.
This is the a mix of veggie I baked in the oven. Broccoli, asparagus, red bell peppers, onions and snow peas.

I marinated this chicken for 48 hours in mederatarian seasoning, extra virgin olive oil, salt, pepper, garlic powder, and the juice of 1 lime.

I used baby bow tie pasta and made a home made alfredo sauce.

1 small container of light cream, 1 container of philadelphia cooking cream, garlic powder and parmigian cheese. 

Mix all ingredients in a sauce pan and heat through on low/medium heat for about 5 minutes or until it's at your desired thickness.

Served with a salad.

Tonight I made stuffed shells.

I browned the hamburger meat.

I decided to make mine vegetarian. I sauteed zucchini, asparagus,tomatoes and onion. 

I mixed 1/2 a can of canned chunky veggie spaghetti sauce, 1/2 a container of ricotta cheese, parmigian cheese and a hand full of swiss cheese.

                                                Served with salad and snow peas

The weakest link

Patience is something I've never really had. I consider myself to be shy, boring and very short tempered. I'm insecure and have pretty much lost everything I thought I had gained while I was modeling. I'm vulnerable and easy to get talked into doing things I know I shouldn't do. After talking to my dad this weekend, I realized that I'm very susceptible to the devil. In my dads metaphor, I'm the weakest link so naturally the devil is going to attack me. I've got a lot of growing up to do (spiritually speaking). I'm not to good to accept what he had to say, because I know it's true, there's no need to deny it like I've done in the past. I've been in a spiritual battle for about 15 years, even though I became a born again Christian at 8 years old. I'm at a point in my life where I don't know where to go from here. I give everything to GOD, but still my patience is lacking. (Another aspect of my life that GOD is currently working on) I don't know what to do anymore. I try to make it seem like I have everything together, but the truth is, the devil is pulling me in 100 different directions. GOD has my heart, so I'm not sure why I'm the "weakest link". The past 3 days, all I've wanted to do is sleep. I've slept 25 hours in the last 3 days and I'm still tired. I try to keep my amour on but something always comes in between us. I have submitted myself to GOD but yet I'm still going through this. I'm sure there is a lesson to be learned here and I'm just not seeing it. I don't want to continue on the rest of my life being the weakest link, it's time for a change.

Pinterest, my new obsession

It always seems like I'm the last to know about new sites. I found out about pinterest about a year ago, but didn't really understand what it was. People started saying, oh look what I made, I found the idea on pinterest. So guess what, I joined too. lol I get so tired of cooking the same old boring things all the time, so I'm really glad I browsed the site earlier this week. So far, I've made 2 things I found on the site. Last night was lasagna rolls. I took the idea from pinterest, not the ingredients. I'm going to share photo's along with ingredients and directions.

This is about 1/2 of a container of grape tomatoes, 1 whole small yellow onion roughly chopped, 2 cloves of fresh garlic, 2 table spoons of butter and  5 table spoons of red wine vinegar. I cooked this while I boiled 8 lasagna noodles and browned ground beef.

We mixed about 1/2 of a large container of ricotta cheese with some parmigian and mozzarella cheeses in a bowl.  

Then we made a hole in the center to add in the ground beef.

We realized we needed a bigger bowl.

And added some sauce and milk because it was dry.

Time to roll them up. (I forgot to take a picture of the tomato and onion mixture after I smashed it with a potato masher.) That's what is on top of the beef and cheeses.

Added some spiced up canned tomato sauce with salt and pepper and shredded mozzarella cheese on top. 

I realized we needed to spread out the filling a little more.

All ready to bake. 350 degrees for 15 minutes.Or until cheese is melted and filling is warm.I added a little pepper on top of the ones with the tomato/onion mixture because the kids didn't want that in theirs.        

Served with green beans! The kids and hubby LOVED it!!

Tonight I had bone-in and skin-on chicken breasts. The kids don't care for that to much, so I decided to take the smallest breast and de-bone it and take off the skin. 

I cut it into bite size pieces.

This is an egg wash, flour, unseasoned bread crumbs ( I added garlic powder, lemon pepper and thyme)

Next time I'll leave out the lemon pepper. The kids didn't care for it.

 All breaded and ready to go in the oven. 350 degrees for 30 minutes. Flip over after 15 minutes.

The remaining pieces of chicken for us adults! Seasoned with lemon pepper and garlic powder.

The kids chicken is done.

Our daughter wasn't crazy about the breading because like everyone else knows, McDonald's makes the best chicken nuggets and she refuses to try anyone elses'. I on the other hand, thought they were good.

Post hysterectomy appointment

I had my 2 week check-up yesterday. After almost a 2 HOUR wait, I finally got to be examined. I guess he was running behind. I felt really bad for my mom because I couldn't drive and she was watching all 3 kids in the waiting room because it was just to hot to just sit in the car and who wants to do that when it's 100 degrees outside, NOT ME!! So the doctor comes in and we start discussing some problems I'm having. He gave me a prescription for a bladder infection and recommended some over the counter fiber pills. He also told me I have 2 blood clots in my wrist from the iv. This surgery was a doozie, let me tell ya!! I don't think I'll ever be ok with getting another iv again. The first one went in while I was in pre-op about 6am and about 3 hours after surgery around 3pm I noticed that I was losing feeling in my hand. I told the nurse and the iv tech came in to put it in my other hand and said "oh, it was probably sitting on a nerve." I've yet to get all the feeling back in that hand, I probably won't ever get it all back. :/ So because of having to get it put in my left hand, I now have the 2 blood clots. Isn't live just lovely??? So yeah, bladder infection meds, fiber meds and now I have to just be patient with these blood clots because they'll just go away on their own and aren't serious. He showed me a copy of the photo's from my surgery and said he took a really bad and nasty looking spot of endometriosis from my right side under my ovary. Which was the place I was hurting the most. Thank GOD all of that's over and all these little inconveniences that I'm going through now are nothing compared to what I could have gone through had I not gone through with the surgery. So again, I thank GOD and count my many blessings. I go back in 4 weeks for another check up, then I'll be cleared to get back to my normal exercising routines. He did say that I can walk the track now and do some light swimming. I can't wait to get back to kickboxing and my really intense ab workouts again. I lost about 5lbs from surgey and I'm really excited about that, so that means I have 20lbs to go. YAY!!!

Being accepted

June 30th 2012

Last night I felt like GOD wanted me to share something with everyone. Every once in a while a topic will just pop into my head and I'll have this unexplainable urge to blog about it. Well, not last night, the urge was there, but no topic. I prayed for GOD to clear my mind and open my eyes so I could see what HE wanted me to share. I went to sleep and didn't think about it at all today until now.

When I write my blogs,I write it the way GOD tells me to. HE doesn't tell me every word, but I definitely feel HIS guidance. I don't know why GOD chose me, I don't know why I'm able to hear HIM speak to me (subconsciously) and I don't know why HE doesn't do this for everyone. I feel extremely blessed and so undeserving at the same time. Even as I'm blogging right now, I'm asking GOD for a clear mind so that I may do HIS will. I have no idea where HE is going to guide me tonight, but I'm sure it will serve a purpose.

The devil is so desperate that he will do anything he can to keep us from GOD. It infuriates him to no end when we glorify GOD. He's left clinging onto anything he can to keep his grip on us hoping that we'll fall back and follow him instead, but the power of GOD defeats him every time. I'm beginning to feel challenged right now, but whatever GOD has for me to share will come through because it is HIS will!!!  I'm in my quiet place, with no distractions, I have a clear mind and I have my soul food (music, to glorify HIM!!)


"How can I say thanks for the things you have done for me
Things so undeserved Yet you give to prove your love for me
The voices of a million angels Cannot express my gratitude
All that I am or ever hope to be I owe it all to Thee"

Psalm 46:10
He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.”


Romans 2:6
God "will give to each person according to what he has done."

Ephesians 2:9
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.

July 3,2012
I feel like GOD wants me to get a little personal tonight. This blog isn't going where I thought it would go.lol Any time I talk about myself, I always wonder if anyone ever reads it. I've never been told this but I just get the feeling people think "so what". I guess it's from me never being "accepted". Whether you have any interest in my life or not, I hope YOU, (whoever YOU are) gets something out of this blog.

Being "accepted" is something I always wanted as a kid. The older I got, it seemed like the less anyone wanted anything to do with me. I was convinced that I was just not likeable by anyone. Kindergarten- 5th grade years were great. I had lots of friends, got invited to birthday parties and sleep-overs then middle school happened. I realize it's a transition phase for everyone. You're starting to go through pubirty, noticing boys, and in today's world pretty much anything goes. I have no idea what I did to deserve the way I was treated in 6th grade. My best friend since 1st grade went to another school and refused to talk to me anymore and a nasty rumor was started about me. Rumors spread like wildfire when your 11/12. Needless to say everyone believed the rumor even when they asked me if it was true and I said "NO!!" They still didn't believe me. I didn't let that stop me though. I still went to school dances, even though I was told in not so nice termes to "go away." I was labled, humiliated, and scared for life. Those girls will never have any idea how much it hurt me. My so called "friends" bad mouthing me and judging me when they didn't really know me and no one ever really took the time to try. Fast forward to 7th grade. I was sitting in homeroom and they announced over the intercom that if you wanted to try out for basketball to go to the cafeteria before 1st period, so I did. I signed up, went to the doctor for a sports physical and passed. I tried out and made the team! I was so happy!! I didn't think I was going to make it so it really surprised me. After I joined the team, those same "friends" started to come back around. I knew better than to trust them, but I atleast I had someone to sit with at lunch instead of by myself. Things got better and I guess they all forgot about the rumors and teasing, but I didn't. It's always been in the back of my mind. 8th grade was pretty much the same way, I played varsity ball that year but I had to quit because of knee and ankle injuries. 8th grade was the year I met my bff. GOD knew I needed someone special in my life and I thank HIM so much for her. We met at church in 1998 and have so many great memories. Growing up in the youth group at church was fun. Her parents tought our sunday school class, we had parties at their house, every youth activity we had, we did it together. Summer camp on the other hand, wasn't as much fun. At age 12/13, Rachel + Laura for a week together= disaster! I can't tell you how many verbal arguments we got into over crazy stuff too. But I love her so much. She's more than a bff, she's my sister and I don't know where I'd be without her. High school was rough, but the weekends were fun because I was either busy doing something with J.R.O.T.C (Junior Reserve Officers Training Corps) or Laura and I were out late at the skating rink (parent-free) we thought we were something else because our parents would just drop us off. For once, I felt accpeted. She accepted me for who I was, she didn't tease me or laugh at me, Laura was/is a TRUE friend. I still looked for acceptance at school, but I didn't get it. I was a loner, at the time I thought it was by choice, but looking back, I was just shy and not out-going at all. The thing I didn't realize was that I was accepted, not by my peers, but by GOD! Even though I was going to church, I did't realize that I wasn't relying on HIM like I should have been. Now that I'm older and looking back at all of this, wishing I would have done things differently, I think it's made me a better person having to go through what I did. I never teased anyone because I knew exactly what it felt like.

Accepting reality

Fully relying on God starts with submission, you have to let HIM be in complete control of your life. I've realized that sometimes it's hard to do, but when you  know that HE has a plan for your life and you can accept that HE is in control, it's easy to do. Even knowing this, I found it hard to do the last few months. I knew that it was in my best interest to have a partial hysterectomy, but it wasn't an easy decision to make. It was selfish of me to not want to do it, because having it done meant that I would never be able to carry another baby. Even though we had made the decision to not have anymore kids, just the thought of not having the option to if we changed our minds hurt me. Having my tubes clamped last summer was the best decision for our family. It ensured that we wouldn't get pregnant again, but I also found out I had endometriosis (a feminine disease). I was miserable for months and the only way I was going to feel better was to have the partial hysterectomy. Since I'd had the clamps put on my tubes, I didn't see any reason to wait on having the surgery. I was really upset a few days before the surgery, but now that it's over, I'm at peace with it. I went to GOD with my concerns and I feel a lot better. No, we may not be able to have anymore, but GOD did bless us with 3 amazing, healthy kids. So instead of being selfish, I should have been counting my blessings.... all 3 of them. 

Using the armor of GOD

Romans 3:23  "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of GOD."
Ephesians 6:11  "Put on the whole armor of GOD, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil."

I've been struggling a lot lately, physically, emotionally and spiritually. Just like a child is disobedient to their parents, I have been disobedient to GOD. Romans 3:23 and Ephesians 6:11 are 2 verses that GOD uses to remind me that no one but JESUS is perfect and that I HAVE to have GOD to win any battle against the devil. For years my relationship with GOD was bittersweet, but lately I've found myself relying on HIM for everything. I realize that I'm going through a trying time and I see this obstacle as GOD begging me to keep relying on HIM. The devil is still trying to convince me to give up, but GOD's voice is so much stronger! I'm holding on to HIM with my whole armor on ready for war! The burdens that I carry will be lifted from me and he will be defeated once again! I feel like I'm stronger than I've ever been in a spiritual sense because I have JESUS on my side. THANK YOU JESUS FOR BEING MY ROCK!

"To God be the glory, great things He has done;
So loved He the world that He gave us His Son,
Who yielded His life an atonement for sin,
And opened the life gate that all may go in."

Eli's 1st Birthday!!!

HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY! 

His 1st birthday was a success. We celebrated with family and friends and he loved his sesame street cake! Our baby boy isn't a "baby" anymore. 12 months worth of milestones complete, but so many more to come. Eli is walking a little, only a few steps here and there but like any kid his age he's more comfortable with crawling. He's waving bye bye and his newest word is bite. We asked him if he wanted a bite bite the other day and he said bite mmmmmm.  He's such a blessing to us, thank you LORD for entrusting us with him!

Milestones 5-8 months old

These last 8 months have just flown by. Eli amazes me every day and I am so happy GOD decided to bless our family with him. I want to share his latest milestones and also to help me keep a record of it..

5 months old: Eli held his bottle for the first time.
6 months old: Eli was able to sit up on his own.
7 months old: Eli got on his hands and knees and started rocking back and forth.
8 months old: Eli crawled and started pulling himself up the same week. He also started clapping and mocking us when we cough or make a noise. He tries so hard to help me feed him. He reaches for the spoon and puts it in his mouth with my help.

He loves watching sprout and when he can't be consoled he loves listening to music.  He loves bath time and there's not a food that we've tried that he won't eat.